Immaturity.

This is a re-post from my cousins's academic writing blog entitled RELATION-ShEePs:

The Top 3 rules in Relationships 101:

1. "Ang mag-assume, TALO (kahit 2% pa yan)."

2. "Kung ayaw may DAHILAN, kung gusto may PARAAN."

3. "Wag masyado magpadala sa text."

Oh diba? Parang bull's eye? It hits you on the face and slaps you on the face then, dump you onto the garbage can. Yung feeling na, wow, ang sakit, tinamaan kasi ako. :| :/ Na sa dinami-rami ng taong pwede tamaan ng tatlong 'yan, feeling ko ako pa ang minalas.

Yet, I believe that these top 3 rules for me or the first 3 rules in the post strike me because I am immature. A person unable to handle day-to-day situations regarding relationships. When I mean to say, relationships, let's face it. I am in the adolescent period facing crisis on the confusion between lovers and friends and projection.

Confusion Lovers and Friends.

You seriously do not know how to coin the term your relationship with him. Maybe you're just friends or maybe lovers. When someones asks you, "sino siya?" and you reply "friend ko lang po siya." But deep inside, there's that intuition/guilt-feeling/conscience/inner-self telling you, "WEH?" An expression of disbelief in that "friend ko lang po siya." Truly, you'd consider him as someone special. Someone who is a whole being who is starting to become part of your life. Yet, you deny it because of the confusion you are facing and the uncertainty that boggles you.

What if? It's not between those two types of relationship that you are confused? What if it's about lovers and ___________. A term I could not encapsulate, or if ever there is even a term for your relationship. Pretty hard? And sad. Like what the song says, "it's a sad, so sad, it's a sad, sad, situation. And it's getting more absurd."

Projection

I guess, girls commit this more often. Yung tipong, feeling ko siya na ang first and last boyfriend ko.

-'Wag naman sana last iha marami pa naman kasi diyan. There's this projection of your future with the person you are currently uhm, having a relationship with? -Still unsure.

Bottomline, there are some things that I still cannot understand between the reality that I am growing up, going into a coed school being exposed to the opposite sex, hearing stories about your classmate's boyfriend, or maybe my dad pleading that I won't fall in love that fast or right now and the illusion of how it is to like a person.

Love. I'm just too young for it. Like? I don't know if I can manage it. Nevertheless, whatever is your ennobling love for the person may sometimes seem to be a mistake but it's the experience that counts. At least, na-experience mo.

Therefore, if I'm too young and immature. I am hoping you'd wait. Sana.

And when I would read this post again when I'm probably 21 or so, I'd laugh how foolish I wrote this entry. HAHA